I have also discovered stepping back, keeping my mouth shut, and letting the test tube fall is a more peaceful way for me to live. I have my own stuff to sort through and only figured that out when there was no one else to sort my pieces. If I'm always stepping in to rescue a situation, then someone else is missing the opportunity to learn for themselves.
It’s finding that balance though. We can’t go through life thinking everyone else will solve things but at the same time we can’t carry the weight of the world on our shoulders.
'The thing is I know I can't affect everything in the world but that doesn’t stop my mind trying to solve problems.'
I'd say that there's no harm in us engaging in such thought processes and determination to solve various problems, as it reaffirms the important fact that we truly care about such important things.
As long as we don't get too ahead of ourselves and try too hard to solve some of those problems.
I've also had it where teaching for the test tube means I knocked something else rolling and instead of one test tube that wasn't mine breaking (and not getting blamed for it) the one I tried to save broke (and I got blamed) and four of mine rolled away and fell too.
We try to teach my kids this. The action is bad but the reaction is worse.
I think learning to zone out the noise is so important. That’s probably one of the hardest things to do in today’s day and age.
Indeed. There’s so much to consume our time and attention.
I have also discovered stepping back, keeping my mouth shut, and letting the test tube fall is a more peaceful way for me to live. I have my own stuff to sort through and only figured that out when there was no one else to sort my pieces. If I'm always stepping in to rescue a situation, then someone else is missing the opportunity to learn for themselves.
It’s finding that balance though. We can’t go through life thinking everyone else will solve things but at the same time we can’t carry the weight of the world on our shoulders.
Good one Martin. I use the Serenity Prayer as a mantra to do what you’re describing.
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the damn difference. 🙏
That’s a great reminder Dee. 👍🏻
3 and 4 are always a huge struggle for me. And a waste of mental energy!
Yes, it’s a constant battle in the mind. I believe there’s a solution out there for everyone- you just need to find it.
This also reminds me of the phrase, Don't push the river. Thanks for a good post, Martin.
Nice. Like that one.
Thank you for this Martin, these are practical lessons. [ must have been a challenging situation for a 14 year old ]
It certainly was Tinashe. A good lesson to learn though maybe.
'The thing is I know I can't affect everything in the world but that doesn’t stop my mind trying to solve problems.'
I'd say that there's no harm in us engaging in such thought processes and determination to solve various problems, as it reaffirms the important fact that we truly care about such important things.
As long as we don't get too ahead of ourselves and try too hard to solve some of those problems.
Yes, it shows we care but we mustn’t let it consume us.
I've also had it where teaching for the test tube means I knocked something else rolling and instead of one test tube that wasn't mine breaking (and not getting blamed for it) the one I tried to save broke (and I got blamed) and four of mine rolled away and fell too.
We try to teach my kids this. The action is bad but the reaction is worse.
So much in life is how we choose to react to situations.
I understand what you are saying.
Thanks Val. It’s a complicated one bound up with anxiety and people pleasing.
I had a much longer complex reply but it was a bit of a life story so I kept it simple.